always.there

when you are well taught in grace, you know self-consciousness will lead to sin-consciousness.

but there are so many things i want to tell You i don't know how to start so i'm going to start by writing.

i have been the most harsh person ever to the friends i hold dearest to my heart. i love them. more than a lot of other people and they are the ones who can hurt me the easiest. but everytime i see them, i lost the smile i always had. there is joy to see them, but also an unknown anger... sometimes i wonder what's wrong with me. sometimes i thought maybe if i stop seeing them altogether i might be happier. but then again, these girls are important to me.

my arrogance does not come with the problem of humility to submitting. somehow i don't know how to explain it. i stop treating some people as equals? i'm not a fair person. and i want to be. all are the same before you but i know i am the most beloved child of You.

take away the anger, the arrogance and the ignorance. only You can do it.

it has been awhile since i wrote anything.

but this place is somewhere i am more comfortable with than facebook.

my words are cutting edge, i know that.
i don't like to judge people but sometimes i still do.
as no one can judge anyone.
i may mean the best, but i don't say it the right way.

that should tell me more than enough.
but i am not sorry i said what i said
just sorry that it did not get across the way it should have.

which brings me to the other issue.
should i or should i not talk to yvonne.

but i am thankful for Daddy God.
because when no one else understands, He always does.

the power of words is so strong

that you never knew you hurt someone until someone hurts you with words.

that you have touched someone until someone else has touched you with words.

Yi Ling executed another very important decision last thursday.

there is no regret, probably just the sadness that her boss still does not understand.

she know what she truly wants. maybe the routes and forks do not lead her to them now.

that does not make the want unattainable

and she understand something more than she did the last 4 years.

Daddy does not love her any lesser just because she made a wrong decision.

that's why she reminds herself that she will forever be Daddy's beloved!

a most wonderful dinner i had tonight.

and saying it out loud just tells me how much i am resting in God's love for me.
and how comfortable i am in all situations now tells me it's by God's grace.

the past few months had been awesome!
and i know it will grow forevermore!

Yi Ling knows she will always be loved.

i made a lot of choices these past few years.

i chose science and maths over arts in JC.

i gave up a teaching scholarship offer for architecture.

i let go of architecture for events.

and the events i am doing now is not what i really want to do.

maybe the romanticist in me knows i rather do weddings and happy events.

and the 'man' in me craves a career where i am my own boss.

i have big dreams and bigger aspirations.

but my efforts are so minimal.

i believe things will come for me.

but i don't believe i can do it without Him and myself.

WITHOUT HIM, I CANNOT.
WITHOUT ME, HE WILL NOT.

i need to find a job soon.

seriously.

but i really only want a job in events.

be it events management, marketing, planner, coordinator..

for conventions, exhibitions, weddings. everything!!

i'm so desperate that i will love to pull all the strings now to get the job!!

Stolen from chun: http://www.quizbox.com/personality/test82.aspx

Your view on yourself:
You are intelligent, honest and sweet. You are friendly to everybody and don't like conflict. Because you're so cheerful and fun people are naturally attracted to you and like to talk to you.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:
Your have very sensible tactics when approaching the opposite sex. In many ways people find your straightforwardness attractive, so you will find yourself with plenty of dates.

Your views on education
Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:
You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:
You are confident that you will be successful in your chosen career and nothing will stop you from trying.

What are you most afraid of:
You are concerned about your image and the way others see you. This means that you try very hard to be accepted by other people. It's time for you to believe in who you are, not what you wear.

Who is your true self:
You are full of energy and confidence. You are unpredictable, with moods changing as quickly as an ocean. You might occasionally be calm and still, but never for long.